When you have a strong desire for a child, it can really be a very large part of your life. You and your significant other may try for many months or years to have a child, and when it doesn’t happen, it can be difficult.

If you do end up pregnant, you will likely want to share that news with your significant other as soon as possible. That is what the woman in this story did, and she decided to share it at a party.

Little did she know that her significant other would be upset about the situation and it would show a side of him that she had never seen before. You can read the full story below:

My boyfriend just turned 30 on Wednesday and had a big party to celebrate it. I hadn’t been feeling well the last couple weeks leading up to it but I was determined to make his birthday a great one. Due to my job and financial reasons, I haven’t been able to take many days off so I scheduled a doctors appointment the morning of his birthday so I could celebrate in the evening. I found out I was pregnant during the appointment and was ecstatic. We’ve been trying for a baby for six years and I thought this would be the perfect present for him.

When I got home, there were a few people already there for the party. I asked my boyfriend if we could speak in private and he ignored me. I asked again and he told me that if it was so important I could wait five minutes while he talked to his friend. So I just told him. He got extremely mad and started yelling in my face about how I was trying to ruin his day and that today was supposed to be about him and not me. He told all the people there to leave and messaged everybody else to not come because I ruined the day. He then stormed out the house and still hasn’t come back.

I’m still so shocked and confused. He was so excited to try for a baby but his reaction made no sense. My mom said that while it is a great surprise I probably should have waited as it was his day. So AITA?

OP mentions in the comments that she is 26 and has been with him for ten years.

Update (1 month later, converted from a screenshot to text)

Hi all! This is an update regarding a post that I made awhile ago about my boyfriends birthday party where I announced to him my pregnancy. It can be found here, (i have to figure out how to embed a link lol sry.). As said in the post, my boyfriend acted pretty irrational and both us were pretty upset. He came home a week and a half after the incident and we talked about our relationship and where we see ourselves. As some of you thought, my boyfriend was cheating on me and was trying to find a way to break up with me.

He told me that he would pay me any amount of money to get an abortion because he does not want to be apart of a childs life and I declined. I told him that I did not care if he didnt want to be apart of my childs life but that I was not going to get rid of my baby. He gave me two weeks to pack all my stuff and get out, which is what I have done. Luckily for me, one of my coworkers was getting transferred and looking for a roommate in a different state so I was lucky enough to ask for a transfer as well and recieved it. I am now living in NC and am adjusting quite well. I’m even looking into enrolling into community college for the fall! Thank you to everybody who opened up my eyes and helped me see what I needed to do to make my life and my childs life better.

u/bettinafairchild found some more info for us:

Some great updates if you check OOP’s history. Like:

some people in my life have said that i’ve changed from the “sweet innocent” person they knew before this whole stupid thing happened. most of my comments in my original post are me apologizing for shit that’s not my fault. i’ve realized i’m not a doormat and people can’t treat me like shit anymore and it’s upsetting to a lot of people.

and

he says he is going to sign away his parental rights when the baby is born and is a massive idiot so he doesn’t realize that he will still have to pay child support once i get all my paperwork together and file. i am planning to get him to pay so don’t worry!

Insight into the relationship:

we are not married because he does not feel like marriage is something that people need to do to prove their love. i would really love to get married ive always dreamed of a really pretty wedding. i don’t have an inheritance or things like that but i think he does. thank you for posting on my post

Insight into the grooming of this 16 year old by a 20 year old:

I didn’t have many friends in high school and then i got with him so I was a stupid teen and felt like I didn’t need anybody else.

A couple years ago I got accepted to a really great college on a wonderful scholarship but it was a few hours away so he got really mad and I ended up not going. But I shouldn’t have asked him to move like that just for me. Thanks for the comment and the advice 🙂

And in another post she mentions she’s financially dependent on him. So a turducken of grooming and coercive control:

separation from friends and family

adult grooming underaged child

financial dependence

prevention of any opportunities that could lead to independence

attempt to control via impregnation (they’ve been trying to have a baby since she was 18; backfired since it looks like he moved on before telling her that he had done so)